The Girl Who Travels

I married the girl who travels.

In our 13 years together she has been as far away as Kazakhstan and has gone to Marfa more times than I can begin to tally (I have never been, more on this later). I knew this when I said “I do” just the same as she knew she was marrying the guy who will prattle on for hours with useless music trivia.

I don’t think that separate vacations is such an unusual proposal and this travel isn’t really vacationing. It’s more of an art form. Me? I have traveled quite a lot in my old rock & roll days, a great opportunity to see America, but not much of a vacation either.

There is no resentment or difficulty or jealously when it comes to this aspect of our relationship. I totally get why this is an important part of her life. Some ladies need an expensive car or a big house or an ambitious husband (Lady Mac Beth anyone?), but the girl who travels needs to just do that.

We do take trips together both as a family and occasionally as a couple, there frequent trips to the ranch in Uvalde and we tool a recent trip to Saint Augustine, Florida for a wedding that was a delight.

People are always shocked when we mention that I have never been on one of the Marfa pilgrimages. It’s usually a well crafted group of people and more often then not, it’s a girls trip. (Not in a snobby way, she just invites folks with the best disposition for a trip that can be challenging in its accommodations.)

If you asked me what it is that the girl who travels does in life I would say that she assembles groups of people into some sort of forwarding momentum. Sometimes that’s the creation of an amazing life transforming event, other times it’s a trip to Marfa. So in a way, taking me to Marfa would be the same as dragging me to the cubical. Well, maybe not, but the closest example I can come up with is John Lennon setting up a bed in the studio for Yoko Ono during the making of the White Album. I’m not going to be anyone’s Yoko.

There’s also another part of our relationship dynamic that influences this: I tend to dote. Because the Marfa trips are in a way “work,” my doting on the girl who travels would be counter productive with what it is she is up to.

I love my girl, and I love that she's the girl who travels. I couldn't imagine changing that anymore than I could imagine changing the way she laughs.